Winner Is
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THE WINNER IS
The winner is. Oh no, you are not going to find out that easy who the winner is. In order to become this winner you must meet several qualifications. Keep in mind these are very unique qualifications that only a special, special person could meet.
The first qualification is you must be able to do silly but great things. For instance sending money to someone for a good report card before you even have it. I'm not talking pidley change, I am talking like a whole $20.00.
The next qualification is you must be blessed with strange talents. You know talents like bocking like a chicken and doing a horse trot noise with your mouth...